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1) They get up early on weekends.

On purpose. To run. Not just every once in awhile, but every single weekend. If they aren’t training, they are racing. Sometimes they burn thousands of calories before you’ve even had your first cup of coffee.

2) They use excessive amounts of ice.

You head to the refrigerator to prepare an icy beverage and end up staring into a cup longingly as the ice maker churns air. Runner are always icing a knee, foot, or leg at any given time. And as their long runs amp up, they use entire freezers of ice to take a bath.

3) They keep weird things in the pantry.

Right next to the Cheerios and the pasta, they hoard strange things like gel packets, salt tabs, and protein powder. Some of their food might seem like run-of-the-mill jelly beans or candy bars, but be rest assured that these are for “sport” only.

4) They are expensive.

Don’t fall for the old ploy that the only equipment runners need are shoes. It’s a slippery slope. GPS watch, mp3 player, hydration belt, handheld, moisture-wicking everything, foam roller, etc. And those race entry fees don’t seem so bad until you have to add a plane ticket and hotel room to the tab.

5) They have extended families.

From running buddies to racing friends, they seem to come with an entourage of like-minded people. They are usually all annoyingly fit and perky. When they gather together, they spend 75% of their time talking about running and fill the other 25% discussing food and injuries. It’s painfully boring, but they won’t notice you slink away as they compare heel drops.

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